Perimenopause and Burnout: How Women Over 40 Can Get the Sleep They Need

Learn and incorporate the 3 phases you need to unlock better sleep.

Thank you for all the feedback on last month’s series on nutrition as it pertains to burnout. Nutrition is so individualized because of heredity and environment (shout out to those who remember the movie “Trading Places” with Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd). Then you throw in food preferences and it can get really tricky. It’s the same with sleep.

My Evolution on Sleep

Sleep wasn't always a priority for me, nor was it frequently discussed in terms of overall health and longevity—perhaps due to the people I associated with or the industries I worked in. Looking back, I realize I was a "master" at burning the candle at both ends, pushing myself so hard that my hormones couldn't recover. Hence the multiple stories on burnout.

Twenty years ago, when I started taking my health seriously, my focus wasn't on sleep but on weight management through diet and exercise (I know, I know…). I also mistakenly believed that it was possible to outrun a bad diet. However, my perspective on sleep changed when I began CrossFit. Although CrossFit itself didn't emphasize sleep, the necessity of being awake and warmed up for the 6am classes—especially during the cold months and dealing with rheumatoid arthritis—made me reconsider its importance.

My husband has always been a proponent of sufficient sleep, able to doze off effortlessly—except on airplanes, where, ironically, I found it easy to sleep, thanks to numerous red-eye flights during my Wall Street days. Joining my husband in early morning routines, since he swam at the same time I went to CrossFit, helped align our schedules, further integrating sleep into my daily regimen.

Wait? Hormones Are Involved In Sleep?

Seriously, why couldn’t I sleep? Between aching knees from running and a hip that eventually needed replacement, sleep was elusive. Despite going to bed exhausted from workouts, work, and daily stresses, I tossed and turned, keeping my husband awake—a situation that was anything but beneficial for our marriage. He couldn’t understand why I struggled to sleep.

I visited a sleep specialist and underwent an overnight sleep study to rule out sleep apnea or other issues. The results showed nothing abnormal. Despite being deep into perimenopause, no one considered hormone testing or suggested it might be the culprit. I remember seeing friends on Facebook, all from my peer group, lamenting our collective insomnia, chalking it up to stress or psychological issues, and being told we just needed to relax. Unfortunately it hasn’t been until recently where my women in tech peeps have started to be more open about this struggle.

My understanding of the role hormones play in sleep didn’t evolve until I read “ROAR” by Dr. Stacy Sims in 2017. The book challenged the oversimplified notion that hormones are something women in midlife can easily control and instead focused on the science. Dr. Sims explained how, as estrogen levels decline during perimenopause and postmenopause, the body becomes more sensitive to cortisol, leading to higher overall levels. This reduction in estrogen lessens its usual moderating effect on stress responses, thus increasing cortisol’s impact.

Dr. Sims detailed how hormonal fluctuations during the menstrual cycle, particularly in the luteal phase, can impair sleep quality. This phase sees a rise in progesterone, often resulting in poorer sleep for about two weeks.

These hormonal shifts can exacerbate stress, disrupt sleep patterns, and affect metabolic functions, making it harder to manage stress and maintain energy levels. Dr. Sims advocates adjusting exercise routines, focusing on recovery, and maintaining a balanced diet to manage these changes.

Specifically regarding sleep, elevated cortisol levels can severely disrupt sleep patterns. High cortisol at night may hinder both falling asleep and staying asleep, significantly degrading sleep quality. This disruption poses a substantial risk of increased fatigue and injury, as the body lacks adequate recovery time.

The Most Underrated Part of Your Day

If you had a big meeting, you would prep for that. If you were taking a big vacation, you would prep for that via packing. 

Given the importance of sleep, how do you prep? Perhaps you finish whatever you could on your ToDo list and then get ready for bed. Or do you get ready for bed straight after playing video games or watching something on TV? 

For women over 40, winding down after a long day is about creating an evening oasis of calm. Go Long breaks this down into 3 simple phases:

1. Transition and Relaxation Phase: Start your evening by slipping into comfortable attire (e.g., sweats, pajamas, etc.). Set a serene atmosphere with soothing music to signal it's time to unwind. Choose a stress-relieving activity like gentle yoga, masturbation, or getting lost in a good book—whatever feels most relaxing to you. This phase is about moving away from the day's bustle and into a state of tranquility.

2. Preparation and Reflection Phase: Prepare your sleep environment by dimming the lights and adjusting the room to a cool, comfortable temperature. Spend a few minutes journaling to clear your mind of any lingering thoughts. This helps reduce mental clutter and prepares you psychologically for sleep, reframing your nighttime routine into a self-care ritual.

3. Sleep Onset Phase: In bed, if sleep doesn’t come right away, engage in calming activities like reading or listening to soft music—no screens allowed. This time is dedicated to coaxing your body into sleep gently and naturally.

These three phases help ensure you end each day enveloped in calm, promoting better sleep and contributing to effective burnout prevention.

Ready to Create a Plan for You?

As stated at the top of this post, sleep is very individualized. Applying the above practices can be helpful but perhaps you need something a bit more bespoke for you. That’s where Go Long comes in. 

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